Author: Nicole Carpenter

Originally hailing from Texas, Kelle Ruden has lived in Westport for 20 years with her husband Jeffrey, who grew up in Westport and graduated from Staples High School in 1982. Many around town know Kelle as an avid gardener who is a past President of the Westport Garden Club and for her previous work as the Programs Director at Westport Library. 

“We are both able to work from home and we are enjoying taking breaks together for a meal or a walk to the end of our road, checking on friends and family and catching up on the latest news. I am also coordinating volunteers to shop for members of our congregation and participating in services and classes via Zoom. 

Jeffrey is Managing Director and Senior Commercial Banker for Fieldpoint Private, I work part time as Lecture Coordinator for Shankar Vedantam, host of NPR’s Hidden Brain. Jeffrey has been working from home since March 12 and his work has been busy because of the reduction in interest rates. Both of us have worked with clients who are anxious about the coming months and the uncertainty of these times. 

Mastering Zoom, upgrading WIFI speed and navigating canceled events dominated the early days. Of course, as the days went on, worries about friends and family became paramount. My brother is deemed “essential” in Houston and had been working without a mask or gloves but he now has them.  Jeff’s mom suffers from Alzheimer’s and cannot really communicate and we cannot see her.  We have concerns for friends whose businesses are suffering and our town, our nation and those who are struggling to get by or are losing their livelihoods and their lives. 

We had heard a bit about the virus in China in January but the reality that it would come to us all struck when we were on a cruise from Feb. 1-15 in the Caribbean. Halfway through the trip- on Feb. 7, the ship was in port in San Juan and the crew began enacting virus protocols- the entire library, board games and puzzles were removed, menus were shrink wrapped after disinfecting, and all on board were asked to refrain from handshaking and to wash hands frequently. And, of course, the ship was cleaned rigorously and constantly.  

COVID forced many of us into a “hard stop” and presented an opportunity to step away from a frantic pace that did not allow for time to rest and recharge, to think or to dream. Of course, many workers have not had the luxury to stop during this time and my hope for them is that they stay well and are celebrated and well compensated for all they have done. We are grateful for this amazing community we live in, and our incredible neighbors.  

My family settled in Texas in 1840 and as Dan Rather once said: “Always marry a woman from Texas. No matter how tough things get, she’s seen tougher.” But more seriously, we are both at an age where we have experienced loss and hardship and had the benefit of the wisdom of family members who have lived through worse: hunger, war and deprivation. This is a challenging time with great loss of life, but historically our country has been through even worse and has come out stronger. 

---

Bob Mitchell is a former chairperson of Westport Museum (Westport Historical Society). He’s lived in Westport with his wife, Kathy, for 22 years.  

As with most people, I am spending a lot more time at home, basically alone. (My wife is an invalid.) I go out for basic errands, and to walk – my principal source of exercise. I am taking advantage of the extra free time to work around the house. I’ll be pretty embarrassed if the many overhanging chores are still undone after life returns to normal. And, I am resuming hobbies and avocations – writing, genealogy, music, scientific analysis – for which I found little time recently in my busy life. 

I am retired. However, I am very active with the Y’s Men of Westport/Weston, and our many face-to-face meetings and activities have been replaced by Zoom, conference calls, and emails. I am responsible for arranging speakers for our weekly meetings, and now am engaged in preparing podcasts, video meetings, and other ‘socially-distanced’ modes of providing camaraderie and involvement for our many home-bound members. 

I was always raised to follow the rules, and to think about other people, so living under the COVID strictures fits right in with my mentality. I also was always more an internal person rather than an external person, so being at home more is not so strange to me. And my wife is not well, so I have long lived a somewhat solitary life. But I still do miss being with other people.  

I miss the lack of direct personal contact. Electronic means are not the same. I thank God that our technology is such today that we can associate with each other in one form or another that was not available until recently. But it is not the same. You cannot hug friends over Zoom. 

I think Westport is doing a very good job with this. Most people are following the guidelines; those businesses that are still open are being very sensible; and the Town government is doing its usual great job. I’m sorry they had to close the beach parking, but I understand that some people, particularly the younger ones who can’t imagine that they could ever catch this ‘old-folks disease’, might well succumb to the temptation, especially as the weather gets nicer. 

I would hope that we learn some lessons about helping each other, thinking before acting, and being generous. I hope that people develop a greater appreciation for the important things in life – family, friends, social activity, healthy fun. I would also hope that our government would take to heart the lessons about not being adequately prepared, in readiness for the next one, whatever it might be. My greatest fears are the growing instances of totalitarian governing in response to the need for strong executive action during the crisis. This crisis will pass, but the changes in our various societies may not. This too shall pass! 

---

Melissa Kane is Westport’s Third Selectperson. Raised in Manhattan she spent summers in Westport as a child in historic houses that her parents rented which she calls “magical places that made Westport a very special place for me. Spending summers in Westport is what I looked most forward to all year.” Kane, her husband John and son George, now 21, moved to Westport when her 2^nd child, Lily was born 17 years ago. 

“I’ve not physically been back to Town Hall since March 12. Working remotely, I’ve been a liaison between the community and the administration with a focus on making sure people have access to the information they need at all times and that they are able to direct their concerns where they need to go and the opportunities to channel their energies into something positive. 

So, I’m focusing a lot of my time on putting together town-led volunteer efforts. So many people want to be doing something right now. I think that at a time like this, when you lose control over everything, there is a sense that if you can just grab onto one thing and be helpful–whether that’s people making masks or working on feeding workers on front line—it allows people to gain a sense of, if not control, some accomplishment. I personally feel this as well. You feel you are moving the ball forward a little bit when you feel helpless otherwise. 

At state level, one of the projects I have been working on, is trying to get better guidelines and regulations for food safety working with organizations like the CT Food association and CT Restaurant Association. I’m also advocating to the governor for these guidelines and regulations to be put out with executive orders and working with Mark Cooper at the Westport-Weston Health district about setting up to have Chamber of commerce field calls about citizens’ concerns about safety when they go to the grocery store or any stores that are open—where there is no uniform way that safety is handled it’s not uniform in any way . Even though there are state regulations, methods vary and that makes people uneasy so I’m working on how you create some uniformity at the state and town level.  

I’m also working on something really cool with our Department of Health & Human Services which has an incredible list of resources for people who are having a hard time practically and emotionally right now. It is really important to talk about the concept of grief that people are feeling now—grief for a life that has been lost. There is so much to unpack around what grief is and what we judge as grief, and what people should be “allowed” to grieve. For example, my parents are 85 and 88 and at risk and scared. I think about them and seniors everywhere who are worrying if they will be spending the end of their lives so isolated. What can we do to alleviate this fear and the grief that comes with it?  

I feel extraordinarily lucky to live in this incredible community which has had sickness and will have more, but we have roofs over our heads and we care about those who don’t and we want to help. It feels good to work with a municipality working so hard to keep people safe.” 

---

Chef Matt Storch, owner of Match restaurant in SoNo and Westport’s own BurgerLobster was born and raised in Westport. He graduated Staples High School in 1995 and currently lives in Fairfield with his wife and nine-year-old twin boys. 

There is a calm that has settled over the area. Not everyone is rushing around, getting to the train and going out. It’s extended family time and I think it’s hitting home with a lot of people, and they are realizing, again, that this is a small community. It’s touching, and I didn’t think Westport had it in it. Even though you can’t see each other, you feel the love. 

Business is ok. We’ve had some great weeks and we’ve had some mediocre weeks, but our staff is employed and we’re keeping them busy. Staying relevant is important and keeping your name in every body’s ears is important. We are doing curbside at both restaurants and have just started Match Provisions where we sell groceries for pick up. We just started and on that first week we immediately got 75 orders. We open orders on Mondays at matchsono.com and close the store on Thursday, pick up is the following Tuesday at the train station parking lot.  We’re selling milk, eggs, butter, gloves, toilet paper, a mixed produce box (CSA style), frozen pasta, shrimp, meat, fresh and shucked clams and oysters from Copps Island Oysters (Norm Bloom & Son) and a new product we’ve created called Copps Casino, which are shucked oysters with a topping that are baked and frozen to reheat. We also sell beer, wine and liquors. 

It’s truly going to be that the strong survive. It’s going to be survival of fittest and whoever is the smartest marketer is going to be lucky here–and I do think it’s luck. I truly do. I think unfortunately some of my fellow restaurateurs made the mistake of not staying open and not trying. I get it—they didn’t feel safe. I think we figured out the safety part—we don’t let anyone in restaurants except staff.   

I strongly believe that I think the restaurant industry is the best industry this could happen to because we are already sanitary. It is what we were trained to do. So, we add a mask—ok, big deal. It’s an inconvenience but it’s not that side of it that is the issue, it’s the hospitality side. That’s what I love about this business– it’s about making people happy. My fear is that the restaurant industry is not going to look anywhere like it did prior to this. I think it’s going to take a long time to get to full dining back with that fun, safe, entertaining, wholesome feeling. It’s sad. I don’t know what’s going to happen. If I can’t walk around my dining room and make people happy it will suck.” 

---

Ohio Native, Jim Marpe and his wife, Mary Ellen, have lived in Westport for 31 years. Previously an executive at Accenture, Marpe served on Westport’s Board of Education and on state-level education boards. Active members at Green’s Farms Church both Marpes serve on multiple non-profit boards. Marpe is also an avid wine collector who says “sampling the collection of excellent wines in my wine cellar is a pleasant way to end a challenging day.” He shares his thoughts on being at the forefront of the COVID-19 crisis management on April 30, the original proposed end-date for social distancing measures. 

“As the First Selectman, I have been working seven days a week to help lead Westport through the COVID-19 crisis. Unlike most of my fellow residents, I haven’t had the opportunity to enjoy the “new normal”. Most of my time is spent working virtually from my office and Zoom studio at home. A typical workday now begins at 7am and rarely ends before 9pm. At least some traditional evening meetings are being moved earlier in the day because of greater resident availability and flexibility. 

Mary Ellen spends a significant part of her time working as member of the Westport Country Playhouse to help the Playhouse manage through this crisis and plan for future re-opening and fund raising. She is also playing a lot of virtual Mahjong with her friends. 

As the chief community advocate for social distancing, I’ve gotten used to it and find it surprisingly natural now. We’ve been able to slow the spread of the virus throughout Westport, and this is the way to do it. We’ll need to stay disciplined about the distancing into the summer months as we begin to open public facilities. My personal style is to meet with people “in-person” as much as possible, so I’ve had to shift my communication approach to deal with many more telephone conferences and Zoom-based meetings. My observation is that Zoom forces a more disciplined and efficient meeting; making them more productive and less contentious.  

I’m very pleased with the way the majority have responded with our request to stay inside as much as possible and to socially distance and facemask as much as possible when in public spaces. Most have taken to the motto. “You’re not stuck inside, you’re safe inside”. As always, there are those who don’t want to follow the rules, but for the most part are willing to if confronted politely.  

We are fortunate to have experienced, professional, Town department heads, deputies and employees who are leading the various dimensions of the Town’s response from first responders to public health officials to human services social workers. Our seniors are surprisingly resilient given their vulnerability to COVID-19. It is interesting to see how part of the community is ready to “open up” right away and other parts are wary of opening too soon and, in fact, continue to encourage me to place more social distancing rules in place. But most of all, the great thing about Westport is the creative ways people have found to volunteer and help their neighbors as well as find alternative and creative ways to pass the time. 

All of my skills, experience and beliefs have been called upon to lead the Westport community through this life-threatening event: 

• faith in God to give me the strength and inspiration I need more than ever 
• quantitative and analytical skills from my schooling and professional career  
• leadership experience throughout my professional and personal life 
• respect for experienced professionals and the ‘chain of command” 
• trust in my team and support of my family  
• listening more and speaking less  
• motivated to act  
• no “analysis paralysis”  
• planning for the return to the “new normal” as well as for tomorrow  
• need to inspire  
• speaking with confidence and empathy  
• dealing with my own fears and anxieties while speaking with confidence and positivity 

My hopes are that we come through the next weeks and months with a limited loss of life and that this terrible journey ends as quickly as possible; that we learn the lessons of preparation for such events in the future and that we take what we’ve learned about operating government and business in a more efficient and technology based manner and apply that to future productivity and cost savings; that we learn to pay more attention to those among us that are having challenges of all types and commit to helping them; that we learn to be satisfied with a simpler lifestyle and realize how much less “stuff” we need to make a difference.  

My biggest fear is that we “re-open” too soon without the necessary testing, contact tracing and personal health condition ID information, which results in going back to the current situation or worse. My biggest long-term fear is that we don’t learn the lessons noted above and rebound to our previous collective lifestyle. I also fear that in our rush to get back to “normal” we may forget the enormous environmental challenges that our planet still faces, and which have had to take a back seat to our battle with the Coronavirus. 

---